Six Steps To Increase Self-Love

In this post, I'm sharing my six steps to increasing self-love, that you can use today.


Back of a lady wearing a white t-shirt and a hat.

I'll never forget the 28th year of my life. That's when I realized that I hadn't truly loved myself most of my 20's. I was in a rut, doing the same thing, living the same life. There was no intention behind my days, no growth, or figuring out how I was meant to live out this life. I decided then to do the work, and increase self-love. This was my turning point. Tell me if you can relate. Have you had such an awakening in your life?

Let me first make it clear that self-love is not selfish. It's not a narcissistic outlook. Instead, it's about bringing more awareness to your needs, being more compassionate with yourself, forgiving your mistakes, and still believing that you deserve better. You are worthy of love and knowing that you can attract joy. It's also about knowing in your heart of hearts that you are whole, and no matter what falls apart around you, your wholeness can never be taken away.

Heart painting

You got this. You will shake it off and get back to creating your happiness! Most of us feel like we're just trying to stay afloat, which puts self-reflection on the back burner. To truly serve others, we need to take care of our mental and physical self first. I honestly don't believe that we can genuinely love others while putting our own needs aside.

That sort of one way street of giving in a relationship leaves people feeling bitter and miserable in the long run. When we're continually self-criticizing or comparing ourselves to others, it prevents us from reaching our full potential. It creates a stressful environment. Whereas self-love and self-compassion will give you the confidence to propel in many areas of your life.

Female hands pouring tea

Women are known to pour themselves into their families, friends, and careers that they rarely spend energy on self-discovery/love. Studies show that there are many benefits to self-love. Self-love is a mindset that leads to higher performance, overall satisfaction of life, and greater well-being. Self-love is not about feeling sorry for yourself and making excuses.

Instead, it's about taking responsibility for your life, making hard choices sometimes, creating healthier habits. Looking at failure as lessons and not defeat. When I started to focus on ways to increase self-love, I started living more in alignment with what brings me peace and joy.

Six Steps To Increase Self-Love

  1. Commit to working out at least every other day. Exercise releases feel-good hormones. By doing so, you'll feel happier and healthier.
  2. Start a journal, leave a journal by your nightstand, write down your thoughts before going to bed, so you don't stress about it while trying to sleep.
  3. Eat an anti-inflammatory diet (as often as you can). It keeps your gut happy and inflammation down. We know that inflammation increases stress and all sorts of diseases.
  4. Do one thing to spark joy in your day. This can be chatting with a friend on the phone, enjoying a green smoothie, taking some time to stretch or meditate, reading, going for a walk. Whatever makes you happy, do it!
  5. Set Reminders on your phone that prompt you to do more of the things that make you happy. This can be a daily reminder that says live intentionally, love more, be kind, etc.
  6. Do something for someone else, serving others is a form of self-love, as long as you do the other things I also mentioned above :)
Women at the beach arms raised up to the sunset

By now, you know the importance of self-love. Know that you are so deserving of love and happiness. You have to believe it within yourself and lead with that energy in all you do in your life. Love your imperfections, own your uniqueness, start acting like the person you want to be tomorrow, today, and soon enough, you'll be living that life.

By the way, every day is not equal. If you can be more intentional with how you treat and love yourself most of the time, you'll be golden. Literally, self-love is at the heart center of everything we create at She Plants Love (also apparent in our brand name).

So I hope by sharing my story it encourages you to love yourself some more going forward. You are more than your circumstances. Life holds great things for you. Love yourself wholeheartedly and trust that you can have the life of your dreams. 

I'd love to know in the comments below how you are loving yourself?


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